With my grandmother in the hospital this week, I can't help but let my mind wonder and reflect back on growing up around her. It has been very hard to have so many miles between us. I was so accustomed to having family right next door for so many years...running in and out of my grandparents house and running down to my aunt's house to play with our cousin...going across town to my Nanny's house to visit...those are some of the things I miss the most...and some of the memories that I will forever cherish.
My nanny used to bake and decorate cakes for people (she could hold her own against Ace of Cakes with no problem!) She did a doll cake for me one year that was so beautiful that I didn't want anyone to touch it! She did these out of her home so her fridge was full of all different colors of icing!! She would re-use those small butter containers and keep the icing in those. Purple, blue, red, pink, green, yellow...every color! I remember standing on my tiptoes, reaching as far back in the fridge as I could and popping off the tops to see what color I could get into that day. It was pure bliss! Of course, when she asked who had been in them, I would tell her I didn't know. The small fingerprints embedded into the icing must have come from somebody else!
My head is full of happy memories of her. She is my last grandparent alive. I know that there will come a day when I say good-bye to her for the last time. I'm not looking forward to that. Losing a family member is never easy. It makes me think of a puzzle. You work on it for a while and when you've placed all the pieces in their particular place, the puzzle is totally complete. Over time, a piece will go missing, then two, then five, until that completed puzzle is no longer complete. There are gaps throughout the whole picture and it just doesn't look right anymore. Then I started thinking of how wonderful it will be when God will put those pieces back for us when we finally go home. I truly find comfort in the fact that whatever happens is God's plan. He is in control and nothing....NOTHING can separate us from His wonderful love. Love you Nanny!
I am actually at a loss for words as I sit and read your blog. I am feeling like a child sitting and thinking " it's Nanny...I don't want her to go" but I am at peace in the fact that God IS in control and like you said will put our puzzle together again, just like brand new. We've lost so many over the years, each and every one close to our hearts. So yes our heart will ache for the ones who have left us behind but I am so excited for the reunion we will have again. She is in God's hands now. We love her and she has always known that. I love you!
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